Monday, May 11, 2009

The reason Twitter was invented

Matt Wieters Doesn't Take Pitches...He Shows Them Mercy.

Albert Pujols’ Mother Drafted Matt Wieters First Overall In Her Fantasy League.

Matt Wieters Can Switch-hit From All Five Sides Of The Plate.

In the First Jurassic Park Movie, The Tyrannosaurus Wasn't Chasing The Jeep. Matt Wieters was Chasing The Tyrannosaurus.

We checked URL not taken, surprisingly.

Zack Greinke Is The Reason The Suicide Rate Is 95 Percent Among Americans Named Zach.

POSTSCRIPT: Recommended.


  1. Zach Greinke doesn't throw curve balls, he scares the ball towards the plate.

  2. When umpires make a call, they turn to Zach Greinke and say, "If that's alright with you, sir."

    When Zack Greinke pitches, the first baseman wears a catcher's mitt.

    Teams recently started employing the Zack Greinke shift when he bats, in which all eight fielders stand in the bleachers and the pitcher stands behind the batting practice screen.

  3. Oh, and just one more:

    Liberty Memorial was actually changed from a WWI memorial to a memorial to all the players beaned by Zack Greinke.

  4. Dang it. I can't stop.

    Zack Greinke can strike you out in ONE pitch.

    When Zack Greinke pitches, the radar gun reads, "Ouch".

    Zack Greinke leads Major League pitching in every statistic, including DBs, Dead Batters.

  5. No posts since May? I guess it is beyond time to stop trusting in Dayton. Fire Dayton Moore now!

  6. Don't ever let anyone tell you the Great Firewall of China isn't a bitch. I have proxies and a VPN (unpaid, so a bit slow), but it's still a hassle accessing Blogger.

    About those trades...