Monday, April 23, 2007

Royals in verse, thanks to De La Rosa

First, De La Rosa just looks and sounds poetic. Maybe it's the concise trochees, the evocation of the maudlin rose, the three capital letters jutting above the rest as if leading a procession... I don't know. But eight innings of one-run ball? Now that's definitely poetic.

Every once in a while, I believe we need a little poetry -- "finer and more philosophical than history," according to Aristotle -- to expand the boundaries of the things we consider, the things we see in everyday life, the things we experience. And so, today's poem -- actually, just a verse, as we're getting dangerously close to tonight's game time -- shall be titled, "Disaster Averted." It's dedicated to the Royals' 3-1 home win over Minnesota yesterday:

Bases loaded and one out in the very first frame
And who but last year's MVP to stride into the fray?
Mighty Casey in the almighty flesh,
Slowly he sways out of the deck.
Five series and five losses to trigger five bouts
Of fits and fuss and howling and doubt
(Not to mention loud fulmination!),
And who but Mighty Morneau, vexing and flexing,
To ensure a sixth damn ruination?
A grand slam is an f-in' comin'.

Of course, it didn't. Jorge De La Rosa struck out Morneau on a 1-2 curveball, got Torii Hunter to fly out to center (never mind that it was deep), and the inning, like that, was over. At one point in the game, De La Rosa retired 16 straight, which almost matched Mark Buehrle's last effort against Texas. (Speaking of Buehrle... he takes the mound tonight, aiming to become just the second pitcher in baseball history to throw consecutive no-hitters. A cookie for whoever can name -- WITHOUT LOOKING IT UP -- the only pitcher to accomplish this feat.) The game lasted just two hours and seven minutes as the Royals claimed their first series win of the season.

If that's not worth pulling out the Dr. Seuss-like verse for, show me the opium.

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