Sunday, July 8, 2007

"It's slow, painful and merciless"

The hapless Tampa Bay Devil Rays were leading 6-4 in the 8th, having battered All-Star Gil Meche, whose lifetime ERA against the D-Rays now stands at 5.65, when the following happened:

Former Royal Jay Witasick relieves starter Andy Sonnanstine. David DeJesus leads off:
Ball
Strike (foul)
Ball
Ball
Ball... WALK
Esteban German:
Ball
Ball
Strike (looking)
Strike (foul)
Ball
Ball... WALK
Mark Teahen:
Bunt foul (leading me to scream, quite loudly, "WHY?!?!")
Bunt foul (MAKE WITASICK THROW A STRIKE, BUDDY [BELL]! WHAT THE #$%& ARE YOU DOING????)
Ball
Foul
Ball
Foul
Ball
Ball... WALK
Casey Fossum relieves Witasick. Emil Brown pinch-hits for Ross Gload:
Strike (foul)
Ball
Ball
Ball
Ball... WALK
DeJesus scores. Alex Gordon up (remember Opening Day vs. Curt Schilling, bases loaded?):
Strike (swinging)
Ball
Ball
Ball
Strike (looking)
Foul
Ball... WALK
Shawn Camp relieves Fossum. Billy Butler up:
Ball
Ball
Base hit! Royals lead 7-6!

Soon after Butler's single to right, the Rays' color commentator moaned that the sequence he just witnessed was "slow, painful and merciless." That's probably one of the best lines I've heard all year.

If a Strawberry Hardaway is drawing three sevens on one's way to 21 in Blackjack, what's drawing five straight walks on 7-7-07? (The Strawberry Hardaway, by the way, is also a newly concocted mixed drink of tequila, lemon juice, strawberries, syrup and balsamic cream on ice.)

The excellent blog Rays of Light, while failing to answer my question, reacted to last night's game with an entry titled Game 86 - BULL%$&#!:

How many games are we going to see this bullpen piss away? How many times are we going to have to write about sure wins that were ripped from the jaws of victory and fed to defeat? Another strong offensive performance against a very good pitcher was wasted as the bullpen couldn't hold onto a 2-run lead.

That really, really resembles something a Royals blogger would have written a year ago. Alas, our bullpen's turned a corner and -- legitimately now, with Zack Greinke registering 98 on the stadium radar and looking absolutely unhittable and Joakim Soria setting up for an effective-again Octavio Dotel -- is now a strength, not merely a "not-a-liability." In addition, the last two performances notwithstanding, the Royals' starting pitching has been solid, and the offense has shown resilience and tenacity and three 17-run performances. For the first time in a long time, it's good to be a Kansas City baseball fan.

As for the Devil Rays... ergh... keep at it, Rays of Light.

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